I posted #MeToo on my Facebook page but to be honest, I almost didn't. I was embarrassed and for a minute I thought, what if the experiences that made me feel uncomfortable aren't valid? And then I realized that every single person that experiences sexual assault and sexual harassment is valid. Every person counts, no matter what. I think that sexual assault and harassment are not taken seriously enough in mainstream culture. But I cannot tell you how many people on Facebook, Twitter, etc., have said #MeToo. I applaud everyone's bravery and because of the countless people that have posted it, I know that this movement is working. People are talking about sexual harassment and assault. People are becoming aware of just how many women are sexually assaulted and harassed, whether it happened once or dozens of times. And every time that someone posts it, there is support. Some girls were brave enough to share their stories and it started a conversation that said our culture needs to get better at protecting each other.
As a female, I've experienced a lot of sexual harassment and some sexual assault but unfortunately, no repercussions ever came for those men that did those things to me. I worry not only about myself but also about my friends, my family, my little sister and my future kids. This is not the world that I want my future kids to grow up in, a world where people think that treating women like that is acceptable or funny.
So I am taking this opportunity to share SOME of my experiences with you all in an attempt to finally call out the men that did those unacceptable things to me. It is not okay and it never was okay.
To the guy in the produce section of my grocery store that came up behind me and grabbed my butt without permission
To the guy that followed me to my car every night after work and tried to convince me to sleep with him
To the guy that grabbed my breast at work
To the guy that came up behind me and groped me at my friend's birthday party
To the boyfriend who tried to force me to sleep with him because he said "I owed it" to him
To the boy that used to "joke" that he was going to rape me
Society has taught women to be silent when these things happen to us. Or to just ignore it. Or to "stop being so dramatic". Or "boys will be boys". No. Boys won't be boys. That is not, nor has it ever been, a valid excuse for this kind of behavior that falls on countless girls every day. There is no excuse and we will no longer be silent. We live in a culture where when a woman says she's been sexually harassed or assaulted, the first question people ask is "Well, what were you wearing?" Or they say something like "You were asking for it."
Sexual assault and harassment are not jokes and they shouldn't be treated like they are. I can guarantee you that when I was 13 years old and walking home from my local grocery store, I didn't "ask" to be followed by creepy men in their car all the way to the end of my street. And what a person's wearing has nothing to do with anything. If we "wanted it", it wouldn't be called assault or harassment. News flash, people. Those words mean that we didn't want it.
So no more excuses. No more blaming women. No more believing that "boys will be boys". I know that not every man is like this but it's time to call out the men that are. It's time to speak up about this issue and realize that it is a much bigger problem than most people think. I am absolutely heartbroken over reading my friends' and family members' stories and it's time to make sure that no other girl ever has a story like that again. Don't you think?
Me too.
-Chelsea
