Followers = Validation?

I recently read an article that said that social media is a positive thing because it helps boosts peoples' egos. And I thought to myself, "Say what?" But as I read the entire article, it all started to make sense.

Let me give you an example. I am subscribed to maybe 15 or so popular YouTubers. And whenever they post a new video, they post a picture on Instagram or Twitter with a caption like, "New video is up guys! Can I get 20,000 'likes' in 20 minutes?" Basically, they are begging for "likes", which to me, is off-putting. But thinking about this article in relation to those captions made me understand the article's point. Does it matter if we spend a week shooting a YouTube video, spend 40 hours editing and are really proud of the final product? Or does it only matter if it gets thousands of "likes"? Are we really only searching for the approval of others? Are our own opinions of what we do and how we live just simply not enough anymore?

The same principle can be tied into other social media sites, like Twitter, Instagram and Facebook. Why do we post pictures of everything we eat? (Actually, I don't do that. I hate when other people do that. I don't care about your food.) Why do we tweet our every thought and question? Why do we post witty statuses?

The answer is simple: for validation. We want people to "like" what we're eating, what we're thinking, etc. I know so many people that are constantly glued to their phones, waiting to see how many "likes" the picture of their Taco Bell quesadilla can get. And why? Because they are somehow seeking the approval of Facebook friends on their eating habits? Pretty much.

This brings me to my next observation. At the end of pretty much every video done by a YouTuber that I subscribe to, they say something like, "Make sure to follow me on Twitter, Tumblr, Instagram and Facebook. Links are in the description." And my first thoughts are always, "Why should I? I subscribe to you on YouTube, isn't that enough? You're just going to constantly be making the same posts but on different websites." I think that it's because when someone has 400,000 Twitter followers, it makes them feel special because people "want" to know about their lives. But do they really? I follow tons of people on Instagram, for example, and I only really look at photos that I care about, which are few and far between.

Plus, it doesn't seem to matter that most of those people following them on Twitter are the same 400,000 people following them on Instagram. But does that matter? No because to them, it's 400,000 people that care about what they ate for lunch that day. Somehow, every time we get a "like" or a follower, it makes us feel better, like we're important or like we're validated for what we do, etc., which shouldn't be the case.

No matter what you post on social media, these people are pretty much all strangers and will probably never meet you. So why are you seeking their attention, love, "likes" and even validation? Just be you. No, scratch that. Just be the best you that you can be and all of that other stuff will follow.

Happy Friday!

-Chelsea

Facebook Deactivation

***Disclaimer: If you like and/or enjoy Facebook, that is fine. I am not bashing you. I am just sharing my personal thoughts and opinions and I respect yours as well.***

So yesterday I did something that, for some odd reason, is a bigger deal than it should be: I deactivated my Facebook profile. This is something that should be a minuscule event in my life, almost unnoteworthy. However, with how much social media has become a "seemingly integral" (and I use that phrase loosely) part of our everyday lives, it has had an immediate effect on my life and how I spend my time.

Honestly, I don't really understand why Facebook is such a phenomenon anyway. Most of the people on my friends list were people that I hadn't spoken 2 words to in the last 5 years and most of what those people had to say was nothing but complaints about their lives, which were full of horrendous grammatical errors. (That is one of my biggest pet peeves.)

Plus, Facebook has that "addictive yet boring" quality. People are on it all the time, for hours a day and yet, they are doing nothing and most of the time, they aren't enjoying their time. But there's this incessant need to check on what your sister's best friend's cousin is doing on his Saturday night. And why is that? Is it our intense curiosity? Is it our love to lurk/stalk other people? Do we have nothing better to do with our time than look at other peoples' lives through a computer/phone screen? Call me crazy but I'd rather be making memories than posting selfies of myself doing "the duck face."  I only wish that I had done this sooner.

So even though it's been less than 24 hours since I deactivated my account, I have significantly decreased the amount of time that I spent on the computer today. The most time that I spent on it today was to write this blog, in fact. I actually ended up using the extra time that I had today to work on a novel that I started outlining a few days ago. See already, in less than a day, I have already used the time that I would have normally spent playing Candy Crush on Facebook and lurking my high school friends, to do something productive and I already feel so much better.

As an introvert, I am drained easily by other people and their drama. So not looking at other peoples' useless drama or big family problems (that people really shouldn't post about on the internet) has helped keep me extremely energized today. I am so happy because all of the productive things that I've done today and I did not miss looking at Facebook at all today. I'm not sure if I'll stay away forever. Who knows, one day I might end up missing it. But with school, work, writing a novel and trying to take care of things for my husband while he's away, I don't have time for anyone else's drama and if my attitude stays this way, then that's okay. However, until then, I hope that my productivity, happiness and energy levels stay up as I live my life away from a computer screen.