Pole Dancing: The Bigger Picture

It is no secret that pole dancing has brought nothing but joy to my life. I'm very vocal about my love my for everything about this sport. It has given me amazing friends, great memories, a new way to exercise, countless laughs and an outlet to express creativity. However, it has also given me a new addiction: competing. Pole dancing competitions are some of the most nerve-wracking things that I've ever done and I still love every second of them. As a naturally competitive person, of course, I want to win. But that doesn't always happen because that's life.

Today I got home from a competition and if I'm being honest, I was disappointed. I had fun going on a road trip with all of my friends from the studio and I had a great time competing. But when I saw my scores, honestly, I was upset. I was very proud of my routine and although I didn't expect to win, I couldn't understand why or how I scored the way that I did. It is difficult when you spend a lot of money to register, spend weeks working on a routine, go through the nerves, actually perform it and wait for the results, only to find out that you didn't do as well as you'd hoped. And that's how I felt when I looked at that score sheet.

Even though I was extremely mad and bitter about it, I had to take a step back and look at the situation. For my routine, I was playing a character and I needed two human props to make my concept happen. So my instructor and another friend from my studio helped out and became human props for my routine. To do that, they had to drive about six hours to the location, pay money to stay in a hotel, be a part of the routine, pay for all of their food while they were gone and drive six hours on the way back home. And they did that for me. Even though they didn't have to. Even though they were only in my routine for around 20 seconds. Even though it wasn't their routine.

Realizing that helped me see the bigger picture. I love pole dancing. I love competing. But what I love the most is the amazing community that I am a part of. Everyone within the community has repeatedly said that pole dancers are the most supportive, most loving, most caring people. Competitions are competitive, of course, but they are also full of men and women encouraging others to do their bests and praising them just for having the guts to try. I feel incredibly grateful and lucky to be a part of this community and to have made such amazing friendship bonds with people from my studio, and others.

I had a great time this weekend. Now that the competition is over, I can say that my placement doesn't matter. I had so much fun running my routine and I left my heart out on that stage. But most importantly, I know that the incredible friends that I've made though this sport have my back and always will. Thank you so much for all that you guys do for me. Please know that it is always noticed and will always be appreciated. I'll never take you all for granted and I don't know how to repay you for all that you've done for me over the past year and a half, or over this weekend. I'm blessed to know you and I love all of you.

-Chelsea

My First Pole Dancing Competition

One week ago, my friends and I packed up our cars and made our way down to Connecticut to compete in the 2016 Northeast Pole Championships. For most of us, it was our first competition and we couldn't have been more nervous or excited.

I'd never done anything like this in my entire life. I grew up playing sports like football and soccer, games that needed a full team. But with this routine, I'd be competing all by myself. I competed on Sunday, while almost all of my friends competed on Saturday. I must admit that I was a little jealous of them. I was so nervous and my nerves seemed to grow by the minute. Part of me just wanted to get the routine over with while the other part of me wanted to savor every possible second of the experience.

Category: Dramatic, Level 2

Song: Daylight by Maroon 5

I was even more nervous because there were many more people in my category as there were in my friends' categories. So I tried telling myself that since there wasn't a great chance that I'd win, that I should just try to take the pressure off of myself and enjoy my performance. But then I felt bad because I didn't want to go into the competition thinking that I wasn't going to win. So I reminded myself that it didn't matter if I won or lost. What mattered is that I spent months working incredibly hard on this routine and that I was doing something that was completely out of my comfort zone. I've loved pole dancing from the second that I started doing it but having the courage to actually compete was something that I never actually thought that I'd attain. Even now, a week later, I'm still a little surprised that I actually did it. Sometimes it feels like a dream.

I was so afraid that I was going to fall on stage or mess us drastically but I didn't. Sure, the routine wasn't perfect. I had a few small hiccups but nothing really even noticeable to anyone but me and my instructor. I am incredibly proud of myself for even competing, even though I didn't win or place. I know that I left my heart and soul on that stage and that I did the best that I possibly could have.

I'm also really glad that I went just because it was a really amazing, fun road trip with some great memories and even better friends. I'll never forget them and all of the laughs, wine and good times that we shared together. I know that when I'm older I'll look back on this experience and feel really lucky that I got to do what I loved to do with some really fantastic people. I'm so glad that we all pushed ourselves and grew together.

And I can't wait to compete again.

-Chelsea

Why I'm a Pole Dancer

Recently, I've taken up and become addicted to a new hobby: pole dancing. This is something that I've always wanted to do but has always been outside of my comfort zone. I never thought that I'd actually get around to doing it. I had a friend that was taking lessons and I was always so jealous of every pole dancing picture that she posted on Facebook. But even still, I always found a way to talk myself out of going to lessons with her.

Then, one day, she sent me a message and asked me to come to a class with her. I was both nervous and excited, but mostly nervous. After my first class, I was hooked and after my fourth class, I decided that I wanted to compete. Before I knew it, I'd absolutely fallen in love with pole dancing.

But even though I loved it so much, for the first few weeks that I went to class, I hardly talked about it. Only a select few people knew that I was doing it. I knew that there was a stigma that surrounded pole dancing and that it tended to be associated with stripping. I didn't want to listen to people make ignorant comments or judge me based on something that I loved. But after a while, I realized that if I hid it, it might look like I was embarrassed about it, even though I wasn't. And more importantly, I realized that I didn't care what other people thought because I knew the truth and that was all that mattered.

So I finally decided to tell people. Once I did, there were a few general reactions that I received. "Oh, you're a pole dancer? I bet your husband loves that", "I can't believe that you're a stripper. I never would've pictured you doing that", etc. They were the same reactions that I'd wanted to avoid. Thankfully, however, there were some people that were, and still are, very supportive of my pole dancing endeavors. And for that, I'm extremely grateful.

But one of the most popular questions that I get asked is why I pole dance. And the answer is quite simple: It's brought me nothing but happiness. Pole dancing has taught me how to be stronger, more flexible and more brave than I've ever been in my life. It's pushed my limits and gotten me to do things that I never thought that I could. It's thrown me out of my comfort zone and gotten me to try new things. It brought me into this wonderful community full of the most supportive, encouraging and delightful people, people that I never would've met otherwise. When anyone in our class succeeds, everyone is genuinely happy for that person. We go out and do things together outside of class and always have a wonderful time together. So I'm not only doing something that I love, I'm doing it while surrounded by amazing company.

 

This move needs some practice but I'm still

incredibly proud of myself for coming this far.

There's also one more significant benefit to pole dancing, one that I never saw coming. I've always had anxiety issues but over the last few years, they've gotten more difficult to deal with. Ever since I've started pole dancing, my anxiety levels have decreased significantly. And that's because I have an outlet, a place to put all of my nervous energy. An escape from my daily life. For an hour an a half a few times a week, nothing else exists and I forget my problems. It's been extremely therapeutic for me. Pole dancing has allowed me to become a more positive and confident person. I feel empowered. I feel strong. I feel better.

I look forward to every class and to learning just what else I'm capable of. I'm learning to do things that I never thought were possible, all while having a good time with wonderful people. I've only been doing this for a few months and I'm amazed at my progress. It makes me wonder how much better I'll be in just a few more months. I've undergone amazing transformations within myself, both inside and out. I'm proud of myself for even trying something new, let alone continuing with it and competing. I'm so glad that my friend asked me to come with her. The only regret that I have is not starting sooner.

So if you have something that you've always wanted to do, do it. It might turn out better than you've ever imagined. It certainly did for me.

-Chelsea