One day, it'll be the last time

Yesterday while I was feeding my son, my husband looks over at me and says, "Aw. He's holding your finger." I looked down and saw that he was, but oddly enough, I hadn't noticed. He does it during every feeding, so it's something that I've gotten used to. But it got me thinking. I don't want to miss out on that stuff, even for a second because one day, that sweet little baby is going to grow up. And those special little moments will fade away.

Now that I'm a parent, I know what adults mean when they say that time goes by too fast. When you're a kid, a year seems like an eternity. But now that I'm grown, I blink and a year has gone by. I still can't believe that this time last year, I had just found out that I was pregnant. It's mind-boggling to me that my son is nearly four months old now and is about to experience his first Christmas. And thinking about it makes me go down memory lane and think about all of my experiences growing up.

One day, my dad held me up on his shoulders for the last time. He didn't know that after that time, I'd be too heavy for him to do it anymore. One day, I stopped wearing my mom's heels around the house. She had no idea that it was the last time she'd find her shoes scattered across her closet. One day, my parents watched me play outside for the last time. They had no idea that after that, they wouldn't hear the sound of my laughter coming from the jungle gym anymore.

And as heartbreaking as it will be, those days will come for me and my son, too. But it's a part of growing up. Every day that passes by goes too quickly nowadays but I have to remind myself that I'm lucky to get a chance to live another day. Every new day is a chance for my son to learn a new skill. It's a chance for new memories. It's a chance to show the people that I love that I love them.

One day, my son will stop holding my finger while he eats. One day, my son will stop hating bath time. One day, my son won't fit in his little monkey pajamas. One day, I'll read my son his last bedtime story. One day, his face won't light up anymore when he sees Elmo. I only have so many of these moments left, just like my parents did with me. So, I'm making a promise to stay more present during these moments and someday, when these moments become memories, I'll remind myself about something very important: "Don't cry because it's over. Smile because it happened."- Dr. Seuss

-Chelsea

Moments

Ever since I gave birth to my son a few weeks ago, I keep finding myself thinking about moments that I wish didn't have to end. Everyone always says that kids grow up too fast but you never really think about it until you have your own. And then you're surprised when you blink and the first few months of their lives go by. People tell you about how the days turn into weeks, the weeks turn into months and the months turn into years.

But nobody tells you about the moments.

Like the moments when they flash their toothless smiles and you soak it in because you know that one day that smile will be full of teeth. Or when they wrap their fingers around yours during every feeding, like they're saying thank you. Or when they cry for you to hold them and you hold them tight because you know that one day they'll be too heavy for you to do it again. Or those moments when they drift off to sleep on your chest because they feel so comfortable and safe. Or when they reach a new milestone and you're so excited; but you feel a small pang of sadness because you know that your little baby isn't going to be little much longer.

I've been blessed with an incredible baby. He's calm. He sleeps through the night. He's easy-going. He loves people and animals. He loves long car rides. His personality is developing a little more each day and it's been so much fun watching him figure out what he likes and doesn't like. We're figuring each other out and creating such a beautiful, special bond. I knew that parenthood would be fun but I didn't know how much of an adventure it would be. Every day is a learning experience for the both of us.

He's still so little now and everyone keeps telling me to enjoy it. They say that these are the moments that I'll miss the most when he's older and I know they're right. I know that I'm going to look back on my life one day and think of these months as the best time of my life. I'm so blessed to be a mom but I'm incredibly lucky to be his mom.

I wish that time could stand still. I'd do anything to make that happen. But I can't. So I'll just keep enjoying every moment possible with my little boy. Creating a family was the best decision I ever made and I'm so thankful that I made it. Now that he's here, I can't imagine my life without him and it's weird to think that there was a time in my life when I wasn't his mom. My world revolves around him and the moments that are worth more to me than anything else in the world. My boy and the memories that we're making together are priceless and I wouldn't trade them for anything.

I always knew that my purpose in life was to be a writer. But now I know that my destiny was also to be a mother. My life is about him and making sure that I make him as happy as he makes me. Everyone always says that life goes by so fast and that we need to stop and smell the roses. And because of my son, I finally have a reason to.

-Chelsea

When People Show You Who They Really Are, You Have to Believe Them

You know how you can tell who your true friends are, the people who really care about you? They tell you things that you don't want to hear. They're honest with you, even if you don't want to hear it. They know that you need to hear it. 

This happened to me two days ago and I keep thinking about it. For a while now, there have been strains in a few of my relationships, ones that should have been easily avoided. Unfortunately, I can't say that I'm surprised that they happened. But the weight of how I've been treated by these people has been keeping me down and affecting me. I'm constantly thinking about it because the pain is so raw and I honestly can't believe that these people would be willing to hurt me like that. 

So as I'm venting to my best friend, she tells me that I'm the one who is hurting myself. She points out that these people have shown me exactly who they are on multiple occasions and that the pain I'm feeling is coming from the fact that I'm hoping that these people will change. But they won't. And to be honest, I didn't want to hear that but the more that I thought about it, I realized that she was right. I'm allowing them to hurt me and in doing so, I'm only hurting myself because they're not losing any sleep over their behavior. Only I am. 

I'm someone that feels things very deeply, someone that was raised to be a good person that considered other peoples' feelings. I would never intentionally hurt someone else or make them feel the way that I have been lately. That's why I can't wrap my brain around this situation and I keep waiting for it to change. But it's not going to because these people aren't me; they weren't raised like I was. These people don't care about me. These people don't deserve me in their lives and they definitely don't deserve to have me obsessing over their behavior towards me. 

I've asked quite a few people for advice about how to handle this and every person keeps telling me the same thing. They tell me to put my guard up and protect my feelings. They tell me to toughen up and put a fence around my heart so that these people can't hurt me anymore. They tell me to cut these people out of my life and if I ever do see them again, be cold to them. And I know that they're right but it feels so weird to go against my natural instincts. I always want to fix problems. I always want to see the best in people. I always want to give people more chances than they probably deserve. But at the end of the day, all that I get is wasted time and heartache. 

It hurts me to know that the actions of other people are forcing me to change. I don't feel like that's fair but I guess that's life. It isn't fair sometimes. And if being cold sometimes and learning not to care as much is going to help me stay mentally healthy, then that's what I'm going to have to do. Obsessing over this has taken up too much of my life already and I need to focus on what I can change, which is how I approach these types of situations. I have to toughen up. My son needs my time and energy, not these people that do nothing but break my heart and cause me to question what I ever did to deserve such treatment. 

I consider myself to be an extremely passionate person who wears their heart on their sleeves. So training myself to be tougher is going to be really hard for me but I need to set an example for my son. He needs to know that nobody else should ever make him question his self-worth. He needs to know that protecting yourself doesn't make you a bad person. He needs to know that negative people are toxic and that negativity is contagious. And he needs to know that I'll do anything to protect us from people that don't have our best interests at heart. So even though I'm very sensitive, feel things on a deep level and have difficulty letting things go, I feel as if I've got no choice but to try to be stronger than I've ever been. Holding onto the past and holding onto people that have already let go is not going to propel me forward. From now on, I'm going to be much more selective of the people that I let into my inner circle. I'm gonna do whatever I can to stop hurting myself and stop other people from hurting me. It isn't worth it and it's making life tougher than it already is. And I officially don't have time for it anymore. 

I'm only sorry that it took me this long to accept the truth: that when people show you who they really are, you have to believe them.

-Chelsea 

If You Condone What's Going on at the Border, Delete Me

Unless you've been living under a rock, I'm sure that you've heard about the familial separations that have been happening at the border. I don't know about you, but I am absolutely disgusted with this. This is not what America stands for and that behavior is absolutely unacceptable. I know that immigration can be a controversial topic and that many people disagree on how we should handle it. And honestly, I don't understand why people get so heated about it. This country was built on immigration but for some reason, I know many people who believe that all immigrants are criminals that should be banned from this country for "taking our jobs" or "using our resources". And you know what I have to say to that? Shame on you. What makes you more worthy of respect, resources, basic human rights or the chance at a better life than anyone else? The fact that you were born in the U.S instead of a third world country? That was pure luck and you need to take a good look at yourself in the mirror if you think that way. Just because someone wasn't born in this country doesn't mean that they don't deserve the same rights that we have. 

On the Statue of Liberty, one of the most iconic American symbols, it says, "Give me your tired, your poor, Your huddled masses yearning to breathe free, The wretched refuse of your teeming shore. Send these, the homeless, tempest-tossed to me, I lift my lamp beside the golden door!” So if you are against the idea of immigration, then you are against one of America's greatest values. Immigration is one of the most American values that we have. I don't know why people in this political climate feel that it is okay to wear their racism or discrimination on their sleeves but it's abhorrent and unacceptable. The fact that I even have to say this leaves a bad taste in my mouth. 

Despite what you may think, what's going on at the border is not a political issue. It's a human rights issue. Children should not be separated from their parents and nobody should be treated the way that these people are being treated. The fact that I know people that are not only condoning this behavior but defending it, makes me sick. Today I heard the argument that "military brats are separated from their parents. So what is so bad about these immigrants being separated from their parents?" I can tell you right now that if this is how you think, you need to delete me right now. There is absolutely no excuse for this behavior and politicizing the military is unacceptable. 

These two issues are completely unrelated. When a person in the military enlists, they do so willingly. They go on their deployments and leave their families behind, that's true. But you know what? They still have ways of contacting them. They have Skype, cell phones, Facebook, etc. They know that their children are safe and protected by their families. That is not the case for these immigrant families. And you know what? Just because military brats have to deal with it doesn't mean that it's easy. As a military spouse, I know how difficult going through a deployment is. Now that I'm 8 months pregnant and my husband just re-enlisted, the next time my husband deploys, he'll be separated from me and our son. 

I have seen how military brats act when their parents are away. Every child reacts differently. And you know what? Either way, it's NOT EASY. I love my husband and our life together. But I can say with 100 percent certainty that when my husband deploys again, I am not looking forward to my son looking at me and asking, "Where is Daddy? When is Daddy coming home?" It is going to be extremely difficult for me and my son. And that is when the children are not being kept away from their parents against their will. If you think that the two are correlated, then you clearly are not in a military family and you clearly don't understand the magnitude of the situation. 

Honestly, I don't care if you disagree with me. This is more than a difference in political opinion. This is a difference in morality. If you advocate for the separation of families, then I ask you to consider your own family. Imagine your children being forcibly taken away from you. You don't know where they are, what they're doing or when you'll get to see them again. If you don't have children, imagine being two years old and being separated from your parents in the same way. We are all equal, whether you want to open your eyes and see that or not. And no matter what your opinions on immigration are, you should not be for the traumatizing of children, which is definitely going to be the result of these actions.

So if you condone this behavior, then you're not someone that I want in my life and I'm ashamed. And if you're someone that thinks that it's easy to be in the military and have a family, then clearly you've never done it. But one thing is for sure, if you believe that in any circumstances that this behavior is acceptable, then you are 100 percent wrong. Period. So if you're one of those people on my Facebook page or any other social media platform that disagrees with me on this issue, then it was nice knowing you. I've always believed that you are the company that you keep and you know what? I will not allow myself to sink down to your level. 

-Chelsea

"You Should Be Published"

My friends and family all know that being a published writer is my ultimate dream. But very few people actually ask to read anything that I've written. So the other day when I was talking to a friend of mine who was asking me questions about starting a blog, I was thrown off when she asked to read some of my other work. But I thought, why not? So I pulled out my phone and showed her one of my favorite pieces that I've ever written and anxiously awaited for her response. 

Now, this was something that a younger Chelsea would never have done. I've wanted to be a writer since I was 8 years old but when I was growing up, I didn't have the confidence to share my work. I would work really hard on a piece or a story and then, when it was finished, I would hide it from everyone. My parents would ask to read everything but I always told them that I was too scared. But I wasn't afraid that they'd react badly or criticize my work. I was afraid that I wasn't as good as I thought I was or wanted to be. When I would work on a piece, I'd feel extremely confident as I was writing it. I knew that I was good and I knew that I was doing what I was meant to do. But as soon as it came time to share my work, I experienced a vulnerability unlike anything else I'd ever felt. and it's been a really difficult battle for me to fight with my inner self and the voices of doubt in my head.

I often heard that I couldn't be a writer if I didn't show people my work and even though I knew that was true, I couldn't bring myself to do it. And even though I've been taking writing lessons for years and have spent a majority of my free time both reading and writing, trying to better myself, I still experienced a huge amount of self-doubt about my abilities. But being a writer is who I am. It's how I express myself. It's what I identify with. I love writing more than anything else in the world. I couldn't imagine my life without it. So I knew that in order to achieve my dream, I would have to quiet that doubtful little voice in my head and listen to what I knew was true. 

And here is the truth: Nobody has ever told me that I wasn't a good writer. My teachers always had positive things to say about my work. My friends and family always praised what little work I did show them. Everyone always genuinely believed in me and my abilities. But for some reason, I chose to listen to fear because fear's voice was so loud that it drowned out the voices of everyone else. And very recently, I learned a very important lesson, that fear is a liar. Fear was what was holding me back from reaching my potential and fear only made me see what could go wrong, not what could go right. 

So to bring this back to my original story, when my friend read my work the other day, she handed my phone back to me and with the utmost sincerity said, "You need to be published. That was so good. You deserve to be published and your story needs to be shared." I can't explain the immense pride that I felt as I listened to her say such beautiful things. It was a real "aha" moment for me. I worked really hard on the piece that I showed her, and it was a very intimate, personal piece. Showing it to her put me in a really vulnerable place and instead of shying away from showing it to her, I chose to embrace it. And I got more confirmation for what I already knew, that I'm on the right track. 

I keep thinking about that conversation, replaying it over and over in my head. And I can't think about it without getting a huge smile on my face. We live in a world where people are quick to tear each other down. The things that we see on the news or on social media make us fear for humanity and can make us wonder if there are anymore good people in the world. And my conversation with my friend the other day made me realize how important it is to spread kindness to others. She could have just said, "That was nice" and left it at that. But she didn't. She told me to go after my dreams and said the words "You should be published", taking it a step further. I've honestly been riding on a high ever since she said that. 

So please know how much your words can affect someone else. If you have the chance to compliment someone or provide them with words of encouragement, do it. You never know how much they'll appreciate it or how much they need to hear it. Hearing those words has helped fuel me to keep working on my current project and actually achieve my dream. And even though I knew that I would never give up on my dream, it was still incredibly helpful to be reminded that other people believe in me too. So I am letting go of my fear and not only holding onto my dreams and my life's purpose, I'm holding onto those words. And you know what? I think she's right and I will spend the rest of my life trying to make that happen for me. 

-Chelsea 

It's Not Because I'm a Girl

My father told me a few hours ago that someone he knows recently made a comment about how girls don't belong on the football field. He expressed his disappointment in this person and his sexism. And even though hours have passed, I can't seem to stop thinking about that comment. As a girl, I've encountered my fair share of sexism over the course of my life. But the fact that sexism is still around boggles my mind.

It's 2018 and women are somehow still fighting the same fight that they've been fighting for decades. They still have to fight for equality, equal pay in some cases and feminist principles. And no, feminism does not mean that women think they are superior to men. It means that women want equality within the sexes. It's no secret that men tend to have it easier in life and that women have to fight twice as hard to earn half the respect of their male counterparts. And you know what? It's just wrong. Plain and simple. That is not to say that everyone thinks this way. But the fact that there still are people that do and there are still extra hurdles that women have to jump through is still a large and unnecessary problem.

I played football for over ten years of my life. Being a football player was a core part of my identity. And guess what? I was pretty darn good. I could throw a ball just as good, if not better, than every boy also out there on that field. So when I hear people say that girls shouldn't be involved in football, I take it very personally. People knew that I was good and as a result, a lot of people respected me for it. But that doesn't mean that everyone did and that I wasn't subject to their sexist opinions and comments.

But here's the thing. I know that there are boys out there that are better athletes than me. I know that there are boys out there that are smarter than me. I know that there are boys out there that are more talented than me. But here's the kicker: It's not because they're boys. Maybe it's because they studied harder than I did. Maybe it's because they worked harder than I did. Maybe it's because they have a natural ability that I don't have. Whatever the case may be, no boy has ever been better than me at anything simply because he's a boy. And I resent the idea that that would be the case.

On the other hand, I've also met boys that I'm smarter than. I've met boys that aren't as athletic as me. I've met boys that aren't as talented as me. And do you know why I was better than them at those things? Because of all of the same answers that I listed above. Because I did the work. Because I worked harder. Because I studied. Because I was born with my own set of natural talents. All of the successes that I've had in my life were not achieved despite the fact that I was a girl. My gender is absolutely irrelevant and people need to stop acting like a person's gender is the end-all of labels and expectations. It's not. If I believed that, I never would've fallen in love with football and I never would've believed that I was just as capable of doing anything that boys can. That belief would've held me back in life and I never would've been able to see myself for what I truly am.

I have NEVER in my life heard ANYONE say that a boy can't do something "because he's a boy". But do you know how many times I've heard people say that I can't do something because I'm a girl? Countless. And it's sickening. What is the main difference between boys and girls? A single body part. Why should my self-worth, my abilities, my brain, my athleticism or anything else in my life be defined by a single, solitary body part? Why are my abilities questioned because of my gender but boys aren't? It's unfair and quite frankly, it's getting old. Scratch that. It is old.

It's 2018 and it's time for the people who still think antiquated, sexist thoughts to get with the times already. Girls are just as valuable as boys are. Girls are just as capable as boys are. Girls are just as smart as boys are. Girls are just as athletic as boys are. Girls are so much more than people give them credit for and we deserve the respect that boys don't have to fight for.

I am strong. I am confident. I am athletic. I am smart. I am worthy. I am talented. I am successful. And none of those things, none at all, are in spite of the fact that I'm a girl. I deserve a place at the table. I deserve credit. I deserve to be judged by my character and not my gender. I deserve respect. And I deserve to be on that football field.

And so does every other girl.

So don't get it twisted. Any shortcomings that I've experienced in my life did not happen because I'm a girl. I am proud of who I am and I am proud of the fight that millions of brave women fight every single day for respect and equality. But what I am not proud of is people who blame my gender for anything or see my gender as a limitation. Shame on you.

-Chelsea

All Because Two People Fell in Love

When my grandmother went on a two week trip to Florida back in 1956, she had no idea that she'd meet her future husband. A true romantic at heart, she was a woman that always dreamed of getting married and having a large family. Although she never knew that she'd obtain it this way, that trip ended up giving her the adventure of a lifetime.

My grandparents were married for over thirty years before my grandfather passed away in 1989. During their time together, they experienced all of the trials and tribulations that life had to offer them and had five children along the way. Three of those five children ended up having children, continuing the family line. My father was the youngest of those five boys and married my mother when he was 20 years old.

A few years later, I came along and a few years after that came my sister. For years, we were all blissfully happy together and I legitimately thought that I was the luckiest kid alive. I was raised in an extremely loving environment and constantly told my friends that my parents would be together forever. Unfortunately, that isn't what happened. People tend to look at divorce as a failed marriage but I don't see it that way.

Let me explain. My parents genuinely loved each other. There was no doubt about that. I could see it in the way that my father looked at my mother. I could hear my mother's adoration for my father in her voice. Love was something that constantly resonated throughout our house. Family time was sacred in our house. We were always together, playing in the pool, going to football games, having family movie nights on Fridays. My sister and I had a genuinely blessed childhood where we got to learn what real love is and how to show it to others.

My parents grew apart and that happens. It's life. I still believe that when they did eventually separate that they still had love for each other in their hearts. But life doesn't always work out the way that you want it to and you have to take the good with the bad. Do I wish that my parents were still together? Sometimes. But does the fact that they're not mean that their marriage was a failure? Absolutely not. Saying that would take away every wonderful and positive thing that happened because of their marriage and that would be an absolute shame. The joy and love that was created through their marriage was and is still bigger than their divorce will ever be.

When I look back on my life, I think about the examples that I was given and about what family really means. My parents' marriage taught me to be respectful to my partner, to communicate my feelings, to always stand up for what I want, to always put the kids first, etc. My parents taught me that if you are going to commit to something, you gotta give it your all.

I can't look at my parents' marriage and see a failure. Because do you know what I see? The purity of young love and hopefulness. A couple's determination to fight through the rough, formative years of their young 20s. The birth of me and my sister. A couple that never missed a single football game or chorus recital. A family that encouraged dreaming big and reaching for the stars. I see a father who spent hours building a jungle gym for me and my sister in the dark so that we could wake up to it on Christmas morning. I see a mother who spent years working the night shift at a job to help my family make end's meet, who still found a way to wake up during the day and take care of my sister and I. 

Everything that has ever happened to my sister and I is only possible because my parents fell in love and took a chance on that love. And everything that they experienced and learned was only possible because their parents fell in love. Now, I'm starting a family of my own and my husband and I will be creating new memories with our son. And we will strive to give our son the best childhood and examples that we can, just like my parents did with me. My son wouldn't be here if my husband and I didn't take a chance on our own love. Our son was created out of that love and will relish in that love, just as I did with my parents and extended family growing up. Taking a chance on love was something that just felt natural to me and has given me the greatest gifts and adventures of my life. But hey, I guess it was in my blood, right?

So thank you, Grandma and Grandpa. I wish that you were still around to see everything and everyone that your love created. None of this would be possible without you. And thank you Mom and Dad. I get to live my best life because you fell in love over thirty years ago. That love helped create me and Kelly and now that love is being passed down to my son. So thank you. The love my family has created has demonstrated just how powerful love can truly be. My family exists, just as many other families do, all because 2 people fell in love. And I know that the cycle will continue with my own son.

-Chelsea

Learn a Little More About Me

A while back, I dropped the ball on this whole blogging thing and very recently, I've been trying to make a conscious effort to start posting on a more regular basis. Once I started becoming more active, I gained a couple new followers. So, thank you to everyone that has decided to follow me, both new and old. I thought that since new people would be following along with me on my journey that it might be a good idea to introduce myself a bit and share some things about myself that you might not know from my blog posts. I hope you enjoy getting to know me a little bit more about me.

1. I'm allergic to cats. This is a common allergy in my family. In fact, most people on my father's side of the family are allergic to cats.

2. I'm very hard on myself. I put a lot of pressure on myself to be perfect even though I know it's unattainable. It's caused a lot of unnecessary strife in my life and it's a problem that I'm making a conscious effort to try to solve.

3. I have an English degree with an emphasis in Literature. I graduated on October 21st of last year and it was one of the best feelings of my entire life.

4. I'm very frugal. I try my best to use coupons when I can and make sure to buy things that are on sale. I've always been this way though. Even as a child, I was a saver and hardly ever touched the money in my piggy bank. I have a very healthy respect for money and know the value of a dollar.

5. If I'm reading a book, I always feel the need to finish it. Even if I'm not enjoying the book, I feel like I have to know how it ends. After investing so much time into it, I feel like if I don't finish it, then I've just wasted my time. Either way you look at it, it can be seen as a waste of time, which is even more frustrating to me. Unfortunately, it's a habit of mine that's been very hard to kick.

I hope that you've enjoyed this little insight into getting to know me better and that you stick around to learn more.

-Chelsea

Please Stop Asking Me This

When a major event happens in your life, some people congratulate you and others tend to ask you inappropriate questions. For example, when I was 20 years old, my boyfriend and I decided to get married before he went into the army. I recognize that 20 is a very young age to get married but it was my choice. And yet, the people that weren't happy for me proceeded to ask me, "What? Are you pregnant or something?"

For the record, I wasn't pregnant. But even if I was, it wouldn't have been anyone's business. If I wanted to tell you, I would have. But the inappropriate questions didn't stop once I got married. People constantly asked me when I was going to have a baby. Some people even went as far as to tell me "It's what women do. They get married and then they have babies". I wasn't ready to have a baby yet and I didn't appreciate the insinuation that it was my "job" to do so. I didn't like the judgment that I got from people. They weren't going to raise the baby, so why was it their business to push me before I was ready? Pressuring someone to get pregnant is inappropriate on many levels because that decision is between the couple and the couple alone. But, on another note, some women can't conceive or have trouble conceiving. So, especially if you don't know the whole story, please keep that question to yourself.

But now that I am pregnant (just under 5 months), the inappropriate questions haven't stopped. Once I started telling people, I had many conversations that went like this:

Person: "What do you want to have?"
Me: "Excuse me?"
Person: "The baby. What kind do you want to have?"
Me: A healthy one.
Person: (Rolls eyes) "I know that but what do you want?"
Me: A healthy baby.
Person: "You know what I mean. Do you want a boy or a girl?"
Me: "Yeah, I do know what you meant. And I meant what I said. I don't care if I have a boy or a girl. I just want them to be healthy. That's all that matters."

My husband and I have both wanted kids for years but wanted to wait for the right time. Now that it is the right time and we both feel that we're ready, we're excited for the adventure of parenthood. But if we would've been unhappy with whatever gender our child would have ended up being, then that would've meant that we weren't ready for parenthood. A baby is a gift and I am beyond happy to know not only am I having a son but that he is healthy.

When my husband and I found out that we were having a boy about a week and a half ago, we were incredibly happy. The ultrasound tech told us that everything looked good and that he was developing nicely. I was filled with joy as I saw my son on the screen and even got to see him smile. We were very excited as we announced to our friends and family that we were having a boy. We received many congratulations messages and lots of support. But even then, some people still chose to ask us inappropriate questions and imply that I had a reason to be unhappy.

Person: "You found out the gender? What are you having?"
Me: "We're having a boy!"
Person: "Oh. Are you okay with that?"
Me: "Excuse me? What's that supposed to mean?"
Person: "Are you okay with not having a girl?"
Me: "I don't care about the gender. All I asked for was a healthy baby. I'm ecstatic to be having a boy."

My son is the greatest gift that I'll ever receive and he is by far the best thing that has ever happened to me. I am so lucky to be his mother. I'm lucky to be able to carry him. I'm lucky to be able to nurture him. And when he's here, I'll be lucky to raise him and help him become a man. Ever since I found out I was pregnant, I had a gut feeling that I was carrying a boy. And you know what? I was thrilled. I've wanted to be a mother for as long as I can remember. So for people to imply that I would be upset that I was carrying a boy is extremely upsetting. The appropriate response when someone tells you that they are pregnant or for when they tell you the gender of their child is: "Congratulations! I'm so happy for you!"

So please, stop implying that I would love my son less than I would love a daughter. Please stop asking me if I'm "okay with" having a boy. Honestly, I couldn't be happier and I'm counting down the days until I get to meet him.

-Chelsea